Recently the popular drama ‘Khaas‘ ended its run on Hum Tv, and sparked frustration from fans.
The plot of the serial followed Saba who deals with her emotionally abusive husband Ammar. She eventually divorces him and marries a more respectful, supportive and caring Fakhir.
And then Fakhir dies. The end.
Oddly enough fans were able to see this ending four episodes in advance, indicating it to be a rather typical occasion. Even the character Fakhir alluded to his ‘not being in her life long’.
This leaves us to question why is all of this display of abuse and short lived bliss so frequent in television?
The majority of the drama was spent showing the audience how mean and abusive Ammar was to Saba. We spent the majority of the time watching her be taunted and pushed around by him.
Granted that it was filmed in a way to show that this behavior is wrong and has a bad effect of people. But Ammar is still shown and seen as the main love interest of Saba. Fakhir barely had any characteristics outside of uplifting Saba.
Furthermore the end symbolically brought Ammar and Saba in visual union together. And it killed Fakhir off for being a decent human being.
Why Give Love A Bad Name?
All of this leaves us to question once again:
Why is abuse so frequent on our TV screens?
Why are abusive relationships portrayed as romantic?
Would it kill producers, writers and directors to show a good love story?
Is it because a love story without violence and neglect is boring?
Are people drawn to the tales of bad men picking and manipulating helpless women?
Why are good men who don’t beat women get to be main romantic interest?
Public Displays of Destruction
‘Khaas‘ is not the first drama to showcase domestic abuse as a spectacle for audiences. Given that these are shown in a way to show that this behavior is wrong, but if that is all we see, where do we get to see good relationships.
Why must every show be about less than comfortable love stories?
Let’s take into account a series like ‘Humsafar‘, I’m sorry but Asher is not a good husband. He barely does anything, and mistreats both of the women in his life. He barely had any emotional input in anything, but this is the character the nation fawned over.
I understand it’s Fawad Khan, but still, that’s not a good character.
Another with the same jerk behavior featuring Fawad Khan is ‘Zindagi Gulzar Hai’. One must wonder what is so special in a character like Zaroon that the ‘self respecting ‘ Kashaf falls for him. He is described in the drama as a misogynist, and is emotionally unavailable. He insults Kashaf in front of his friends and when she runs off he doesn’t even contact her himself.
But Kashaf getting knocked up by him is supposed to be a happy ending? ‘slow claps’
And this trope of questionable love stories keeps going on.
Even if I accept that stories like these maybe bring in good ratings and are dramatic, why cant we have dramas with normal relationships to balance out the crazy?
Even in dramas like ‘Gul-e-Rana‘, ‘Khaani‘ and ‘Man Mayal‘ there is this act of women being robbed of their agency by romantic partners.
I mean a man who kidnaps you probably or murders your brother is probably not the one you introduce to your family?
Let’s also look at the recent ‘Aangan‘ which we loved for the set design. Ahad Raza Mir is again someone who you wouldn’t want your best friend to deal with. And even now in his upcoming drama with Sajal Ali, the nature of the relationship shown on TV is questionable.
There are of course dramas with cute love stories. I hope.
But is all of this so frequent ?
Where is the Love? Where did the love go?
Again I am aware that there are dramas out there and movies with good love stories. But being honest it’s these creepy abusive ones that get the most attention.
Like why do all the potential good guys always killed off in accidents? Why should the female protagonist lose interest in the actual decent person? Because he didn’t love her enough to kidnap her?
( So much Stockholm syndrome)
It was also sad to see that the writers of ‘Gul-e-Rana‘ actually had an empowering ending, which the public rejected.
I believe that this kind of reaction comes from a number of factors.
Audiences at the time and still now have to see these relationships as exciting and a standard to what love is. Maybe this is some kind of sick fantasy women have.
Maybe because we haven’t shown enough productive relationships on TV and film, that abuse distant hurtful love is all people respond to. Maybe we should a variety of realities to TV so people understand that certain fiction doesn’t apply to everything.
What About the Children?
The problem beyond a lack of variety of subject and romance is the limitation of the audience in mind.
These dramas are made for an adult female audience, but since they are only thing to get investment and press, it ends being what children end up watching also.
It’s Raining Men and not the good kind
Let’s face it ladies every guy who is a jerk doesn’t always have the money to back up the lack of a personality.
I feel like there needs to do some sort of intervention, where a variety for channel and content is available for everyone.
There needs to be some decent content for boys and men, that inspires them and shows then how to be better and not be a jerk.
Because if the only depiction on TV of men is a bum husband or romantic interest with bad morals that’s probably all we will find in young men watching these shows.
Maybe if we gave them good ( non-Bollywood ) content they will be better?
Something really has to be done.
Bollywood, Hollywood and Beyond
For a more diverse retrospective I will admit that despite the problems in our dramas they do allow women agency and a victory in their own situation and they get to be the center and win in the end. They get that full scale happy ending and emancipation.
Non of this can be said for Bollywood movies.
In contemporary Indian movies and going back to the early 2000’s there has been an increase in the objectification and side-lining of female characters. They are basically prizes to be won and overall they say and behave in a non progressive way. And not in a good realistic way.
Looking at the characters Shah Rukh Khan has done over the years, we see that he is someone who ridicules and plays with the women he is involved with. Female characters in Bollywood films generally have no goals or agency, and they are just ditsy love interests.
Overall it’s a very male fantasy/ visual pleasure/ creepy/ nice guy/toxic masculinity mental and visual space. Somehow they’ve gotten away with so much in our otherwise conservative part of the world. And a bad way at that.
It needs to stop, or at least people need to wake up.
Hollywood again is no innocent,clean place but they’ve always a variety of voices to balance things out. And reform has been possible by people who understand how the media works calling them out of the wrong things.
The academic discussion always pours out into the mainstream there, which I wish was frequent in South Asia also.
But even so Hollywood has definitely done a lot to objectify and just a lot of creepy things, for which a lot of materiel is available online which discusses the negative work of such content.
We can only hope that at some point the media doesn’t continue to mistreat and abuse a large chunk of their audience. And I understand among all of this is the writers or directors vision, but the discussion must be had.
Maheen Ahmed – Writing to create culture
@lahore_la_notte
